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For reference we're both in our mids. I have been understanding of the demands of his career for many years, but I have come to realized that I'm not happy living this way. I wish you all well on your recovery from this particularly vile church. My spouse and I are best friends first and I think that's what really makes it work. I volunteer every week, I put others before myself, etc. In my home ward, the non-member son of one of the members of the Bishopbric was able to stand up with the Priesthood and hold his baby girl while they gave her baby blessing. Try to find out his schedule in detail. I'm sorry you may be hearing a lot of negativity from us.
I clearly stated twice that I severed things with the girl. Anyway, before you marry you should work out anything hypothetical that might come up in the future. Sometimes I complain to my kids and to my husband. Notify me of new posts via email. All this said, God is love and fully understands and appreciates your problem. If it is already an issue in your relationship, then it'll amplify to an extreme if you get married. God knows the big picture. We need to believe fully and then we make choices, not the other way around. I've only been married for 1 year and the situation is kicking me right on my behind.